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Why Girls' & Guys' Nights Out May Actually Be Hurting Your Marriage

9/21/2016

2 Comments

 
Is Girls' Night Out bad for your marriage? We care about your marriage. We care about your happiness. Lean in close and listen up, because we'd like to have a little heart-to-heart with you about an issue that may be sensitive issue for some of you (So we'll try and tread lightly!). We love feel-good articles that are encouraging and uplifting, and we hope that this article will be encouraging and up-lifting...however, we feel the need to be a little bold in sharing some personal thoughts about an issue that may be causing more harm to your marriage than you may realize. What is it?
Written by Aaron & April Jacob
Lean in close and listen up, because we'd like to have a little heart-to-heart with you about an issue that may be somewhat sensitive for some of you (We'll try and tread lightly!). 

While we hope that this article will be encouraging and uplifting, we feel the need to be a little bold in sharing some personal thoughts about an issue that may be causing more harm to your marriage than you may realize. 

What is it?


We want to talk about Girls’ Nights out and Guys’ Nights out. Or Girls’ trips and Guys’ trips.

You know what we're talking about.

  • Girls’ night out getting mani/pedi’s and dinner.
  • Guys’ night out watching the big game and eating nachos.
  • Girls’ night out at a concert + ice cream.
  • Guys’ night out going paint balling and eating burgers and fries.
  • Girls' trips shopping the weekend away and laying by the pool.
  • Guys' trips full of hunting, fishing, and mountain biking. 

READ: 100 WAYS TO SERVE YOUR SPOUSE

These kinds of activities - though seemingly harmless - may be hurting your marriage.

You heard us right - these kinds of activities may be hurting your marriage.


And for that reason, we kind of have a problem with them. It’s true.

Why, you ask? 

Well, let us explain.

You are all ears, right, because you have at least a dozen reasons why all of the above activities are perfectly acceptable and should be encouraged? We get you! (We like friends, too!)


So, here is our explanation and the caveat behind this very personal pet peeve of ours -

When people are intentional about girls' and guys' nights out while forgetting to be intentional about date night, romantic getaways, and time spent with their better half (aka, their spouse!), then those activities become harmful to their marriage.


Yes, Girls' and Guys' nights out can harm your marriage when they take priority over time spent with your spouse - your #1. 

Simply stated, it isn't good for marriages when friends take priority over spouses. 

Catch our drift?

So, let's be clear here - we're not talking about Girls’ Nights Out or Guys’ Trips being inherently bad (because they aren't), we're talking about priorities.
​

READ: 10 WAYS TO CHOOSE JOY IN MARRIAGE

Yes, our message is all about priorities. ​
Why Girls' and Guys' Nights Out May Actually Be Hurting Your Marriage - Is time spent with your friends taking priority over time spent with your spouse? Beware!
If you look at your schedule and know that next month you have a big trip with your friend, awesome, but please, please, please, make sure you ALSO have a trip scheduled with your spouse in the near future.

If you want to do lunch with your girlfriend, great, but please, please, please, make sure you ALSO have a lunch date scheduled with your spouse this week. 


Priorities, folks.

READ: 50 WAYS TO SHOW LOVE

Your priorities are obvious in the way you spend your time and with who(m) you spend your time.

You may have the best intentions at heart, but your calendar shares obvious clues about who matters most to you and who you are intentional about giving your time to.

We are all busy. We have a lot of demands on our time. So when people spend time, thought, planning, and money on girls’ nights out and guys’ weekends away, all while letting their marriages wilt and die from a lack of intentionality, you had better bet we're going to speak up.

​(
***Now, if you ARE intentional about prioritizing your marriage above your friends - which you probably are - then just ignore this article and give yourself a pat on the back! Also, you are right - anything could replace GNO’s here - running, video games, work, shopping, etc. This is a message about prioritizing your spouse, not about why GNO’s are bad, because they aren’t.)

So, please note that we are not against time spent with the gals or guys. At all. We just want to encourage you to be intentional about the following two priorities FIRST (deal?):  

  1. Be intentional about date nights with your spouse. Date nights should get your best planning, your best creative powers, and your best time slot. Here are 100 date ideas to help you. 
  2. Be intentional about planning fun romantic getaway trips with your spouse. Romantic getaways should get your best planning, your best creative powers, and your best time slot. Read this article to help you remember why you and your spouse need a getaway. Stat. 

​Yes, we are encouraging - even inviting - you to prioritize your spouse this week. Give him or her your very best time, and your very best self.

We're confident that if you give your spouse your best time, that there will be plenty of time left over for a few much-needed outings with friends. And you will find that in prioritizing your spouse and nurturing your marriage, that your marriage will be stronger, you will feel a closer connection to your spouse, and you will find that happily ever after is yours for the choosing. 

Happy prioritizing.

Photo Credit: Jason Corey Photography 

You may also enjoy 7 Date Nights to Get Your Adrenaline Pumping and 3 Ways to Improve Sexual Intimacy
2 Comments
Dave
1/9/2022 04:42:37 pm

Very helpful. only read that girls nights out are so important and should be encourage this shines a spotlight on the important parts of a marriage.

Reply
SCOTT WYCOFF
6/13/2022 03:28:50 pm

Hi, did you know there are spells to win love back from an ex. I have done it. I love reading about relationships and how to make them work, how to better the relationship, and how to keep the spark alive, even how to talk to them a certain way to get them to think a different way about the situation and you. If you need advice or want to win your ex back, try this: emutemple@gmail.com copy and message on the following ( emutemple@gmail.com ) It will change your mentality and get you what you want. Facebook page Https://web.facebook.com/Emu-Temple- 104891335203341

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  • About
    • Us
    • Our Foundational Analogy
    • What We Believe
    • Meet Our Contributors
    • Featured On...
  • 6 Pillars to Nurturing Marriage
    • The Little Things
    • Date Night
    • Intimacy
    • Values to Live By
    • Routines and Rituals
    • Conflict Resolution
  • More
    • Romantic Getaways
    • Money Matters
    • Featured Couples
    • On a Lighter Note
  • BUY OUR BOOKS
    • LOVE IS PATIENT, LOVE IS KIND: A CHRISTIAN MARRIAGE DEVOTIONAL
    • NURTURE
  • Coaching Services
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    • Shareable Quotes
    • Become a Contributor
    • Speaking Engagements
    • Partner with Us
    • Privacy Policy
    • Join the Community >
      • Subscribe to our Newsletter
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