17 Gestures that Make Women Feel Loved

11/16/2016

This list is sooo cute! I wish my husband did all of these things!

After a huge response to our 17 Gestures that Make Men Feel Loved, here is the long-awaited list of 17 Gestures that Make Women Feel Loved.

Once again, these ideas are simply that - ideas. Not all of them will work in your marriage, but one of them might. And if you implement just one of these into your marriage this week, nurturing is going to happen, friends. And that is very good news.

1. Hug her for at least thirty seconds every day.

Affection. It's at the heart of what your wife wants. Really, though. Of course she wants more than that, too, but most of all she wants to feel safe in your arms. She wants to feel cared about. She wants to be touched in gentle ways. So hug her for at least thirty seconds every day. Do it. Every day.

2. Be thoughtful.

Your wife is probably a pretty selfless person and she probably does way more for you than you realize. So start paying attention to all that she is doing and tell her, "thank you." Offer to help - to carry something, to open a door, to bring something downstairs that she needs. Pay attention to all she is doing and find ways to help.

3. Spend time with her.

One of the best ways you can let your wife know you love her is by giving her your most precious commodity - your time. Make it clear that you want to spend time with her, whether that is talking, watching a show, going for a run, or working in the backyard together. She will feel loved when she feels that you genuinely want to be with her.

4. Listen to her.

Your wife wants to talk to you - about everything under the sun. She wants to have meaningful conversations with you because that helps her to feel emotionally connected to you. If you feel like you don't have anything to say, then read through these 15 Tricks to Help You Learn to Talk to Your Spouse Again, and practice. Give it time, before you know it, you will have plenty to talk about.

5. Take care of yourself.

Yes, you. Take care of you. Do everything you can to keep yourself in a healthy place - emotionally, physically, and spiritually. Be positive and happy. Exercise and eat healthy. And take care of your soul. Your wife finds all of that super attractive.

6. Remember her birthday.

And your anniversary. And Valentine's Day. And did we mention, her birthday? Really remember it - and plan something fun. Get that gift she has been wanting. Pick up dinner. Buy flowers. Plan a romantic getaway. You know your wife best and what she would love, whether that is chocolate, jewelry, or a day at the spa. Whatever you choose, do not forget those important dates. When you remember those dates, you show your wife that you remember her and that she is special to you.

7. Ask her out on dates.

Yep, your wife still wants to date you. And have adventures with you. And kiss you under the full moon. So plan some fun dates (you don't have to break the bank, cheap dates are just as fun!) and go create memories together. If you have forgotten how to ask your wife out, read this article.

8. Compliment her on her looks.

Tell her she is beautiful. Every day. If you like her hair, tell her. If you like her outfit, tell her. If her eyes are extra sparkly, let her know. Make an effort every day to notice how beautiful she is inside and out, and let her know how much you like that.

17 Gestures that Make Women Feel Loved - the cutest list ever! All men need to read this!

9. Give her a day off.

Ah, that wife of yours. She is something else. She is always going, moving, helping, doing. And she needs a break. So give her a break. Send her out for the day, to do whatever her heart desires (or book a hotel for her so she can sleep her heart out). She deserves a break. And magically, as you take over for a day, you will find a new-found gratitude for her and for all she gets done in one 24-hour period.

10. Be sensitive.

Your wife needs you to be sensitive to her needs and stresses. She needs you to pay attention to how she is feeling physically & emotionally. She needs you to be sensitive. She may need your sensitivity in the bedroom, or during a stressful week at work. She may need your sensitivity when she accidentally backs out into the closed garage door, or when that commercial makes her cry, or when she is on her period, or when she is obviously hangry. Just be more sensitive. She will love you for it.

11. Do a project with her.

Next Saturday, ask your wife what project she would like your help with. She will go crazy. Enough said.

12. Encourage her in one of her hobbies.

Your wife needs time to develop, grow, progress, and find some happy in simple ways outside of her work/family. Perhaps she has shown an interest in painting, or CrossFit, or golf (lucky you). Whatever your wife is interested in, encourage her. Give her wings to fly. As she finds balance and develops herself more, she will be a happier, more fulfilled, more positive person to be around. And that is always a win-win.

13. Buy a surprise gift for her.

It could be small, like a pack of gum with a mushy love note, or big, like that road-bike she has been eyeing. It could be a salad or sandwich you pick up, or tickets to the symphony. You know your wife best. So, from time to time buy something for her to express your love for her. Super romantic. Just do it.

14. Go shopping with her.

Your wife may be a big shopper and she may not be. No matter what, offer to go shopping with her. Whether that is grocery shopping, random errand shopping, or fun-things-she-wants shopping. And be happy. Smile while you are shopping. And flirt. And don't even think about the $$$.

15. Kiss her often.

Like 8 to 10 times a day. Your wife needs to be kissed. And touched. In gentle ways. Touch is a simple key to a happy marriage because it's fun for you and it is fun for your wife. And it leads to an emotional and physical intimacy that is necessary for a healthy and happy marriage. So go kiss your wife, and then see if she doesn't want to kiss you back and then some.

16. Fold the laundry.

Or wash the dishes. Or deep-clean the blinds. Or wash the microwave. Or clean her car. There are hundreds of ways you can say "I love you" by doing something small around the home/yard. You two are a team, and when you up your game in the house-cleaning department your wife is going to want to kiss you. Like, really kiss you. Do it.

17. Respect her.

Your wife is your other half (your better half, really), your best friend, your confidante, and your one true love. So respect her. Be loyal to her. Listen to her opinion. Trust her ideas. Learn from her example. Speak highly of her always - in private and in public. Be kind. Be gentle. Be encouraging. And always, always, always treat her like a lady should be treated.

There you have it, 17 gestures that will help your wife feel loved (here is the men's version if you missed it). Now, this isn't an end-all-be-all list mind you. It's just a few simple ideas that will help your wife feel closer to you. And when your wife feels close to you, good things happen, folks. Good things happen.

So, go love your wife.

Photo Credit: Caitlinn Mahar-Daniels

This list is spot on. And so cute. Relationship goals.

You may also enjoy The Very Best Thing You Can Do For Your Spouse and The Best Marriage Advice Around

31 Comments

Erin

4/12/2017 10:40:51 am

I don't understand why the wife list says to adopt "your man's" hobby, while the husband list says simply to encourage your wife in her own hobby. Why shouldn't he adopt her hobby as well? And, really why are there 2 different lists at all? Married couples should encourage and love each other in the same ways, regardless of whether they are a man or woman. These lists are the most sexist things I have read in awhile. (And that's saying something, considering our current president)

...

4/21/2017 08:47:15 pm

That is the main thing that men won't and don't understand, we are clearly not the same creators we differ from each other and that is why men don't understand a women

Katelyn

5/8/2017 09:20:20 am

I have to agree with you, Erin. I read the list for husbands first, and decided I would read the list for wives before I commented or agreed on any comment. IMHO, there should not be 2 separate lists. Yes, men and women ARE different, but in this day and age, marriage is a partnership that should be 50/50. And if you insist on 2 separate lists, please pay attention to wording-- women must adopt their husband's hobbies, but men only have to support their women's hobbies? And women have to "respect their role" but men have to "respect her." It is sexist and ridiculous; men and women in relationships should just naturally respect each other, and "roles" should not actually even be a thing in a committed, reciprocated relationship. What I will say is that if these were combined into one cohesive list with "roles" redacted, I think it would be pretty perfect. Men should have to initiate sex just as often as women, and with touch, not with a question (women are just as guilty of this).

Regardless, most of the suggestions (from both lists) sound wonderful, and they would resemble an excellent article if edited and combined into a "How Spouses Can Make Each Other Feel Loved" list. I think the intent behind the lists was spot-on, but a lot of the message got lost in semantics.

Cotrell Trotter

5/2/2021 08:35:44 pm

Actually, it says ask her what what project she is doing that she wants your help with. This is your que. Also it says in the spend time with her section it gives examples but this is open for any hobby she has. Its just worded differently. Women don't want men in their hobbies all the time do they?

Aaron & April link

5/9/2017 07:02:59 am

Erin, ..., and Katelyn - Thanks so much for your comments! We appreciate your insights and feedback. We simply hoped to suggest ideas that would help motivate spouses to act and to start making steps towards nurturing their marriages. One list would be a great idea, and maybe that will be an article we put out in the near future.

OnJanea link

7/7/2023 09:20:19 am

No, I praise God you guys put out two separate lists ! I believe men and women are different and have two separate needs. By you guys helping women understand men and men understand women I feel you guys help bring the two differences together, as a partnership. Keep it up! I was blessed because of you guy's knowledge.

Don't listen to the world. You guys know who is the wisest. God or this world ?

Kiley

11/20/2018 04:55:51 pm

Because I don’t want my husband to take up my hobby. It’s my only outlet alone, and when I’m interested in one of his, he’s super happy about it, so maybe it’s just a guy thing and a girl thing. We’re very different creatures and marriage really shows just how different we are, so the psychology behind it works.

7/7/2023 09:21:10 am

I second this, I would like to do my hobby alone lol.

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5/2/2021 08:24:04 pm

well... the reason the lists are different is because men and women don't need the same things. The lists are similar in some places and the same in some places. But even at the risk of sounding like the sexist you despise, I will say most of what was said as far as the want the man needs I have found to be absolutely correct. Even if you don't understand why or think you should do it. Its good advice.

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Destiny

6/6/2017 05:58:41 pm

I think both lists are great, I am definitely going to do my best to do these things and share the other list with my partner! 😉

6/24/2017 06:33:26 pm

Destiny,

Thanks for your kind words! The lists are simply suggestions to get people thinking about what they can do to help their spouse feel loved. You'll find what works for you.

Best to you!

Aaron & April

Sara

6/21/2017 07:35:29 am

I also agree with Destiny. We are not all alike in this day of 2000+ ! But these lists are true and still work for some of us. I've tried them and the suggestions became me and my aim, not a list. The list was to remind me of what I believed all along. Thank you! Love dies if not nurtured. In nurturing love, your partner grows into what you need and Love becomes a tangible thing once again and lasts through the years. I am 57 and happy and in love with the same man I married at 19. Keep on sharing your message!

6/24/2017 06:35:19 pm

Sara,

Thank you, thank you for your encouragement and example! Our sole hope is that couples will work to take care of this most precious relationship - the marriage relationship! We hope they will love and cherish each other through the day-to-day and the tough times. We believe that nurturing is key to happy marriages and we can tell that you have experienced that yourself.

Thanks, again!

Aaron & April

Mary

8/9/2017 01:47:28 am

Thanks for a very good article. This day n age with the enemy attacking families n marriages. These suggestions are Awesome.Thanks for sharing these ideals,also for the people opinion it makes me want to be a excellent wife and a better lover to my soon to be husband😉

8/23/2017 08:02:31 pm

Mary,

Thank you, thank you for your kind words! We hope they simply encourage couples to take care of their marriages. If you liked these, you may enjoy our new book: https://www.amazon.com/Nurture-100-Practical-Tips-Marriage/dp/1546603816

Best to you!

Nina

2/1/2018 01:30:58 pm

Some of this is fine but some of it is a flaming pile of garbage. Why do we even have two lists. Why is it not things to do for your significant other. How dated...

Amanda Booth

6/26/2018 02:57:01 am

I think I have hit the Jackpot... or rather I know I have hit the Jackpot.. as my husband does all of this and I show him great appreciation in so many ways.

I enjoyed both articles... and think they are good

Mandy

10/18/2018 04:13:47 am

Spot on. With regards to the above comments - I think the point is that men want something different from women when it comes to the hobby question. A man is more likely than a woman to feel connection through DOING something together. I can sit with tea with my husband and chat all day long (because that is how I connect), while he's writhing restlessly in his chair. This is why guys [typically] are more likely to bond through video games and football than "grabbing coffee." And don't start in with, "I'm a girl and I like video games." That misses the point. The point is that male bonding [TYPICALLY!] looks different than female bonding. Whereas he wants me to help him build the shed because it makes him feel connected to me, I need space and freedom to go for a run or write (we have three young kids, and if he doesn't back me up and take over the house/kids for me, I'll never get to do the things I enjoy. Fortunately he does... daily). I think it was very wise of the authors to dial in to this subtle difference and include it in the lists. I really enjoyed reading them.

Anna

8/14/2019 06:26:20 am

Very well said! I agree 100%.

Ken

11/18/2018 11:01:10 am

I think the people complaining are sexist, clearly they don't understand that men and women are built differently, wired differently and deemed by God to serve different purposes, I found both lists perfect and enjoyable, and have started practicing my wife was smiling all through her hug. Don't listen to bitter people you're doing a good job. Thank you.

Fiona

4/12/2022 09:00:37 am

Hello Ken, I'm sure Lori appreciated that commwmt. Lol.

Jerry

6/23/2020 02:56:42 pm

Both list are amazing. My wife and I are very different. as soon as I saw the list for guys I immediately smiled. Every single thing on the list were things I desired. Then I check out the list for women I was amazed because these are all things I do for my wife.

For those that are stating that these list are sexist (or something along those lines) Please help me understand why you think so. Cuz I believe that masculine and feminine energy manifest differently and a healthy fostering of those energies will make for a powerful family.

I love it when my wife helps me with my hobbies and I truly desire that she really goes for her hobbies on her own.

Lenore Cyrus

10/5/2020 09:25:31 am

Just what I was looking for; how each partner can make the other one happier rather than selfishly I say we. The ideas are spot on and educational and as such i will make some copies for further reference and to advise others on how to improve their relationships.

Thank you.

Lenore Cyrus.

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