The Second Glance Chance Challenge

Written by Bethany Bartholomew

Ever do a double take when your spouse walks by?

Did you do one when you first met?

​There are probably many reasons why you would look twice at your spouse, especially since your spouse should be the most attractive person to you. But why not look twice at other features? What do you see when you look inside? ​

Here’s a 5-minute Second Glance Chance Challenge - 

Whatever your spouse’s flaws, quirks, and imperfections may be, it’s time to put those on hold.

For just five minutes (at least) take the time to really see your spouse, and take note of the best in your better half.

Minute One:

Start with your spouse’s outward features.

Look at your spouse for one minute.

60 seconds straight.

What features do you notice? What are some of your favorite physical characteristics that you see?

It can be simple even. I’ve always been smitten with the crinkles that show up next to my husband’s eyes every time he smiles. Sappy, I know. But you know you’ve got sappy thoughts about your significant other too. So embrace the sappiness and take note of all things attractive about your spouse.

Great.

We’ve gotten that past us.

Your spouse should be physically attractive to you, and that’s important to recognize and to recognize often, but now on to the deeper things—the things we don’t always see on the first glance.

Give your spouse a chance with a second glance starting with minute two.

READ: 3 THINGS TO DO IF YOU ARE HAVING MARRIAGE PROBLEMS

Minute Two:

Time to take a look inside.

What’s usually on your spouse’s mind?
What are the things that make your spouse happy?
What do they like to do in their spare time?

Take note of your spouse’s dreams, goals, and accomplishments. Your spouse is unique and has their own thoughts and hopes that make them motivated to do what they do every day.

​As you notice these things, you may be reminded of some of the personality traits, dreams, and fun quirks that made you fall in love with your unique one-and-only spouse in the first place. ​

Minute Three:

Now for a look outside again, but this is less about looks and more about the outward evidences of your spouse’s love.

How does your spouse treat you?
How does your spouse treat your family and friends?
What do you love about how your spouse acts around you and your loved ones and how he or she makes you feel?

Everyone is imperfect, and there will be times when your spouse says or does something that is not how you would want them to act. But those imperfections aren’t permanent.

Think of the good moments instead. What wonderful surprises, or even everyday things, have shown you that your spouse is still the fun, kind, or even spontaneous person you chose to marry?

Minute Four:

Back to business.

What is your spouse always working on?
What does your spouse do for a living?
Is your spouse a business executive?
A homemaker?
A student?
What do you love about the things that your spouse does from 9 to 5?

While these may not be the same things your spouse did when you were first married, or even last year, these are a huge part of your life together.

What drives your spouse to do what they do every day?
Why does that make your spouse happy?

More than likely, your spouse’s talents are another unique trait that helped shaped them into the person you adore so much. Think of some things that make your spouse happy and be happy with them for their successes and their passions and their interests.

​READ: 17 GESTURES THAT MAKE MEN FEEL LOVED

Minute Five:

One last look inside.

What is always written on your spouse’s heart?

What are the things, the people, the thoughts, and the beliefs that are closest to your spouse? And how does your spouse share his or her heart with others?

Your spouse may always be out serving the community or even just volunteering as a coach for your neighborhood softball team.

Your spouse may make sure to tell you they love you before heading out the door every day. Or your spouse may be a particularly good listener.

Look at your spouse’s heart, and you may find it seems to get bigger and bigger the more you think about it.

As your spouse’s heart reaches happy-ending-Grinch proportions in your mind, take note of what has made it so special and so loving.

What do you love about your spouse’s love?

Now that you’ve taken five minutes to focus on just your spouse, you can move on to finishing that book you were reading or scrolling through your best friend’s Instagram.

But don’t forget what you saw.

And tomorrow, take another second glance chance on your spouse. Or even take a few minutes to tell your spouse out loud what things you’ve been admiring about them during this challenge.

​Remember to look a little deeper and see a little farther. There might be more to your spouse than meets the eye.

Top Photo Credit: Bryan Striegler Photo

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