Andre & Kamila Scott

Quick Facts
Years Married: Almost 8
Location: Maryland
Kids: 2 beautiful daughters
Occupations: Andre is a  Warehouse agent, where his work consists of heavy manual labor & Kamila is an administrative assistant at a non-profit law firm.
Hobbies/Interests: Andre likes to work out at the gym and play football on his playstation 4. He's very competitive. Kamila loves to inspire others through the art of dance. She likes to sing and go bowling. They both enjoy eating crabs and attending family events.
Favorite flavor of ice cream: Andre - Neapolitan; Kamila - Cookies & Cream.
Instagram: @yourmarriageisyour1stministry

Q. What are some of the little things you do for each other to express your love and appreciation? 

A: I love to cook breakfast for us on my days off. 

K: I love to give him morning massages before I leave for work. Morning rub downs are my specialty. He deserves it because he works hard. 

Q. What are your top three tips for a healthy sexual relationship? 

1. Have sex often. Refrain from turning each other down and do what pleases the other. We find the more sex you have with each other, the more you’ll want it. Sex is one way to connect with one another, to bond in a way you wouldn’t with anyone else. 

2. Do not use sex as a form of manipulation. 
K: I did this, and it was one of the many things that almost destroyed our marriage. Any form of control within the marriage will do more harm than you can even imagine. 

3. The marriage bed should be fun and enjoyable, so enjoy it.

Q. What suggestions can you share to help couples improve their communication? 

We would suggest to always be honest no matter how tough the situation, to be a good listener and to do away with the silent treatment. 

K: Looking back, we would have shouting matches as a form of communicating and it kept our home full of tension. We never listened to each other in order to resolve a matter, but only to respond and to prove our individual point(s). I read somewhere that, “a good listener always listens with their heart.” 

Many are unaware that the silent treatment is a form of communication, but it’s never effective. I could walk around the house for days and not speak a word to my husband. And I was okay with that, not understanding that we were slowly drifting further apart from each other as the days went on. Refuse to allow the enemy of silence to ruin your marriage. Keep talking!

Q. What has been your favorite date you have been on together? 

Our favorite date so far was our 5th wedding anniversary weekend, where we stayed at the Gala in National Harbor. The scenery and atmosphere was so beautiful and peaceful. We were able to tour parts of Virginia and D.C. on the water taxi. It was such a cool ride. We ended our weekend visiting the National Zoo Park in D.C. It was a weekend to remember.

Q. Why is forgiveness so vital in marriage? 

K: My husband and I are together today because forgiveness played a major part in our marriage and the healing process. There will be mistakes, misunderstanding, words spoken, regrets, and arguments in every marriage. We must learn the importance of forgiveness so that the divorce rate can decrease. Pride and forgiveness cannot live in the same space. My husband and I went through one of our worst season’s in our marriage thus far - adultery. To experience so many high emotions, with all kinds of crazy thoughts all over the place, and then to hear the Lord say, “Forgive, as I have forgiven you.” I didn’t know if I could, but in the Lord’s strength, wisdom, attending counseling and through much prayer, it happened. But it didn’t happen overnight. I had to allow time to take its course. We have watched God do amazing things with us and He has reconciled a union that was broken. 

Q. What have you learned about nurturing your marriage through the transitions of life? 

The truth is that marriage is hard, and life is even harder, especially when you have so many other things going on at the same time. Maintaining a life full of ups and downs can be challenging, but it’s possible. Having a good support system is extremely important. You need people in your life that can encourage the both of you. Prayer is another way to nurture your marriage. Praying together draws you closer to each other and to God. We have to remember to always pull together during the challenging seasons. When a couple is committed to working together as a team, there is nothing they cannot overcome.

Q. You are still married. What is your secret to a happy marriage? 

We are approaching our 8th wedding anniversary on September 14th. Being newly married, marriage has taught us a lot these past seven years.  Our secret (but not really a secret) to a happy marriage is a relationship with Christ, having a genuine friendship, and having regular date nights. We may not always like what the other says or does, but love helps us to see past the flaws and to love unconditionally. Many couples often neglect the things it took to “woo” their spouse, like dating, because they are too busy with this and that. We believe every spouse needs that one-on-one time, because it strengthens your marriage and strengthens your friendship. Make time for the people and the things that are important to you.