It has happened to the best of us. After a long day at work, a quick bite to eat, and no time together, someone said something that sparked a bit of an argument. You look at the clock, 11:00 pm. You have a meeting you have to be at first thing in the morning. You are tired. You aren't up for a long, drawn-out disagreement where you feel like you can't win. So, what do you do?
Due to the late hour, some of the usual methods for conflict resolution might not work right now (taking a time out, going for a run, getting busy doing something else, talking through the issue, compromising, laughing it off, etc). So, you find yourself with a very strong urge to grab your pillow, get a blanket out of the closet, end the argument by playing the ignoring/silent treatment card, and head to the couch.
If you ever find yourself in this situation, you may want to try one of these suggestions. They work well and we promise, you'll sleep much better!
1. Love on each other.
Being humble is tough. We get it. But as tough as it is, just say you are sorry (even if you feel it was the other person's fault!). Just do it. Kiss. Kiss some more. Then love on each other. A little love goes a long way. Some people call it "make-up sex." Whatever you call it - it works! A little physical love should work wonders for your little disagreement. Just remember, once you have said, "sorry," your not-so-happy conversation is over. O.V.E.R. Don't try and talk things out any more at the moment (ladies), just love on each other.
2. Agree to sleep on it.
While this may not sound as exciting as the first option, it's still a good alternative.
Take a deep breath and just tell your spouse, in a kind voice, that you need to sleep on it. Gather your senses, tell them, "I love you, even though we don't always agree," and ask if you can continue the conversation later when you aren't tired and it isn't practically the middle of the night.
Then go to sleep. Yes, go to sleep. Not on the couch. Not in another room. In your bed. Right next to the spouse that is driving you crazy (but that you still are madly in love with!). It's very likely that after a good night's sleep, calmer heads will prevail and all will be well. Just don't wake up in the morning and make the mistake of acting like nothing happened. Be humble, say you're sorry, hug and kiss your spouse, and start a new day (on the right side of the bed!).
"What counts in making a happy marriage is not so much how compatible you are, but how you deal with incompatibility."
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